We’ve all seen some denim disasters in our time. Here’s a compilation of rules to follow to ensure you aren’t the denim eyesore in the room. I’ve added some suggestions in case you discover you have made a major fashion faux pas.
Before you leave the house in your favorite pair of jeans, stop and take a long look in the mirror. Is your backside sagging like a day-old diaper? Are your jeans so acid-washed they belong in an ’80s music video? Do the tapered legs make you look like a walking ice cream cone? Could your waistband double as a push-up bra?
According to Oprah’s in-house experts, about nine out of 10 women are wearing the wrong jeans. So, yes, that probably means you. To combat this out-of-control epidemic, Oprah asks Stacy London, host of TLC’s What Not to Wear, to debunk denim myths and warn you about common fashion blunders.
Muffin Top or Dunlap Syndrome
The dreaded muffin top or dunlap syndrome. You know, when your stomach dun’ lap over your jeans! The “muffin top” is caused by a waistband that’s too low, too tight and your tummy spills over the sides of your jeans. That’s how you know you’re a member of the muffin club. There’s good news for muffins! Go mid-rise! Styles like Diesel Ronhar Bootcut Jeans in Medium Wash will keep your belly from bulging.
Plumber’s Crack
Whale Tale
Unless you have a tool belt strapped to your waist, there’s no excuse for plumber’s crack nor the whale tale. Low-rise jeans are usually the culprit. Before you crouch or sit , be sure to pull down your shirt and hike up your pants! I’m not interested in what yo’ momma gave you! Or if you still want to be sexy. Get the Rock & Republic Berlin Lowrise Skinny in Regression Line, a hot jean that accentuates your butt with a slightly higher rise. Dare to not bare… your underwear.
Ice Cream Cone Effect
If you have thin ankles and you want to show them off, by all means, buy a tapered jean. But, keep in mind, tapered denim only accentuates the width of the hips. Flares will lessen the carrot shaped legs. Try Diesel YBO Wide Leg Jean or J Brand Lovestory Jeans. I’ve yet to see anyone look bad in either of those jeans.
Mom Jeans
Tina Fey has taught us all the wrongs of Mom Jeans. I’ve even started MY MOM on designer denim . My momma is wearing Paige Premium Denim Avalon and they look GREAT on her and she doesn’t look “Mutton dressed as lamb”.
Common denim myths.
Boot cut is flattering on everyone.
Stretch Myth
Stretch denim is always better. NOT!!! Sometimes stretch denim can make your legs look like sausage in casing if it’s too tight. Another reason to avoid stretchy fabric? Stacy says the skin-tight fit can give women “dimples” right below the tush. Her advice is to try on nonstretch, as well as stretch, to find the best fit. Try 7 For All Mankind Flynt Jean or try J Brand Mid Rise Flare if you must have stretch. Their stretch is the best I’ve found on the market.
A “Distressing” Myth
Distressing doesn’t always look great on everyone. Old jeans distressed along the leg, can “spotlight” your thighs. In the wrong place, whiskering, bleaching or distressing can actually accent a wide hip, a larger booty or a heavier thigh. Distressed jeans also look more casual than darker denim. Dark-wash jeans like Raven Denim Sierra Trouser Jeans are perfect for your denim Fridays and are a great evening look!
Don’t Be a Fashion Victim!!!
