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What maketh a man

post #1 of 133
Thread Starter 
I am sincerely surprised at the intensity with which this forum slags off people with a perceived lack of dress sense without even trying to get to know them better. Do clothes maketh a man? Is that how you judge people? How do you folks meet someone? Would you brush someone off just because they wear UGG's or fake dieseld? What happened to personality, wit, sense of humour and just general "against all odds"?

I am curious, because I used to be one of the guys that didn't really cared about how good jeans make look my butt or legs. They were a piece of clothing. I was cheap, just came to America as a very poor student and Gap to me was expensive. It was an awful feeling when I would go to a bar or restaurant and people here wouldn't want to talk to me or would make fun out of me because I didn't have designer clothes.

So how do you meet someone whom you like? Do they have to be decked out in designer clothes and well fitting clothes for you to like them? Do they have to have sparkly white teeth (or implants) or that perfect waist-to-length proprtion?I know, I know - shoes are important, you have to be nice and clean and polite, but everyone here seems to be so obsessed and fixated on brands and labels and ready to dismiss off someone who shops at Walmart or Sears. Would you give that girl/guy a second chance?

Most of the couples I have met that have most fun seem to care least about clothes and gimmicks. I know I prefer simplicity, but I'll give an equal chance to someone who spends one hour in front of the mirror making sure the butt is just right in THESE jeans and THIS shirt, as well as to someone who will just throw one something regular and boring but will not make me wait in order to go out.
Is it possible that some of you are trying too hard?
post #2 of 133

Re: What maketh a man

No.
post #3 of 133
I don't judge by their clothing, that's silly. The majority of people don't have good fashion sense, but that doesn't make them bad.
post #4 of 133
Thread Starter 
I see (and read) quite the contrary in this forum. People seem to jump to conclusions based on just a piece of clothing, without bothering to get to know a (or the) person.
post #5 of 133
amen,
the thread "sometimes i feel like slitting my wrists" made me sick, hating someone because they wear uggs and other clothes you wouldnt wear, imagine if you were that girl who went out to a party feeling good about what you were wearing and how you looked and then discovered a whole online forum bashing you simply because of the clothes you wear, i personally would be devastated, so what if they arent up to your fashion standards she could be the kindest and nicest person ever but because she wears uggs and "shitty jeans" you disassociate with her, im not simply referring to this one thread there have been many, and i feel that all of you who make fun of people simply because of clothing should be ashamed of yourselves
post #6 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by ForAllTrueCitizens
amen,
the thread "sometimes i feel like slitting my wrists" made me sick, hating someone because they wear uggs and other clothes you wouldnt wear, imagine if you were that girl who went out to a party feeling good about what you were wearing and how you looked and then discovered a whole online forum bashing you simply because of the clothes you wear, i personally would be devastated, so what if they arent up to your fashion standards she could be the kindest and nicest person ever but because she wears uggs and "shitty jeans" you disassociate with her, im not simply referring to this one thread there have been many, and i feel that all of you who make fun of people simply because of clothing should be ashamed of yourselves
AGREE COMPLETELY
post #7 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by ForAllTrueCitizens
amen,
the thread "sometimes i feel like slitting my wrists" made me sick, hating someone because they wear uggs and other clothes you wouldnt wear, imagine if you were that girl who went out to a party feeling good about what you were wearing and how you looked and then discovered a whole online forum bashing you simply because of the clothes you wear, i personally would be devastated, so what if they arent up to your fashion standards she could be the kindest and nicest person ever but because she wears uggs and "shitty jeans" you disassociate with her, im not simply referring to this one thread there have been many, and i feel that all of you who make fun of people simply because of clothing should be ashamed of yourselves
Hence why I locked the thread
post #8 of 133
Attraction plays a big part in first impressions, but looks can only go so far whether they are dressed in expensive clothing or not.

For me, confidence in ones self is very attractive in a woman, i'm guessing it may be similar if it were a man? Buying high priced brands does not necessarily make you stylish or fashionable IMO.

P.S. Not all of us are obsessed with being "decked" in expensive brands from head to toe.
post #9 of 133
heck no. I mean of all my closest friends, I'm the only one (with one exception) who wears designer anything. Heck, they all think I'm nuts. Do I think less of them? NO, they're my fave ppl in the world. I actually can't STAND most of the ppl who dress similarily as I do and REALLY can't stand it when ppl assume I'm like others who wear similar clothes as me (hell, I'd have to kill myself if I were).
example, I have a pair of uggs (because I live in Saskatchewan where our winters get to minus (yes, minus) 40 and 60) I do wear sevens and I have the odd juicy shit, but compare me to a frickin teen-bopper, whatever, marissa cooper ym-reading, ashton kutcher lovin' whatever girl who thinks getting like soooo plastered I can't talk is like soooo what makes me cool every weekend and I'll kick your ass. (and please kick my ass if I ever start resembling them..no, you won't need to, I'll kick my own ass)

I also am a firm believer in the whole "it's not what you wear, it's how you wear" it mantra. I have friends who won't touch designer but somehow look amazing. I also, for example, have a friend who spends shitloads of money on clothes (more than even I can comprehend) and honestly, looks bad a lot of the time. Dude, just cuz it's expensive, doesn't mean it looks good. And just cuz it's not, doesn't necessarily mean it looks bad (note, the necessarily, cuz there's some ughly cheapo tacky sheit out there..)

anyway, cheers.
post #10 of 133
to quote the dude . . . "That and a pair of testicles" :P
post #11 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by JillianS
heck no. I mean of all my closest friends, I'm the only one (with one exception) who wears designer anything. Heck, they all think I'm nuts. Do I think less of them? NO, they're my fave ppl in the world.
Same here. One of my friends exclusively wears Nike, Adidas, and sports jerseys all the time, another wears band shirts and Levis, and the other ones closest consists of mostly skater hoodies from Winners. The most expensive thing out of those 3 they have is an Ovechkin jersey (I think he got it for $100.) They look at my clothing and say I spend WAY too much. They're still my best friends and we get along fine.
post #12 of 133
i judge personality. personality can sometimes be judged by what a person wears. also, it depends on how the person carriers his/her-self. if some silly girl walks around with her nose in the air because shes wearing juicy from head to toe, ill call her a stupid cunt. but youre right about judging people through pictures alone. but considering theyre pictures, i tend to judge them based off of people/personalities i actually do know.
post #13 of 133
and i really dont think anyone here has the right to say "you should be ashamed of yourselves", because face it. we have all been guilty of making snap judgements. and to sort of answer the question... im very selective about who i date or hang out with. but i dont base my selection on clothing [usually].
post #14 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by ForAllTrueCitizens
amen,
the thread "sometimes i feel like slitting my wrists" made me sick, hating someone because they wear uggs and other clothes you wouldnt wear, imagine if you were that girl who went out to a party feeling good about what you were wearing and how you looked and then discovered a whole online forum bashing you simply because of the clothes you wear, i personally would be devastated, so what if they arent up to your fashion standards she could be the kindest and nicest person ever but because she wears uggs and "shitty jeans" you disassociate with her, im not simply referring to this one thread there have been many, and i feel that all of you who make fun of people simply because of clothing should be ashamed of yourselves
i dont know. people who only wear black clothes all the time with like black makeup might be considered gothic. people who wear baggy 'urban brand' clothes might be considered 'ghetto' etc etc etc. people who wear uggs? well it's a generalization but a lot of the time it holds true. the words im looking for are "unnecessary" and just plain "dumb".
i also find them irritating cos of the way that people WEAR them.. i mean, i see people sporting these things as if they are some super trendy fashion hipster and it's like "no, you're retarded". seriously, who are you kidding? do you really feel hot wearing these awful things which EVERYONE and their mother (literally!) owns? maybe im just bitter cos i see shitloads of them on a daily basis but i just think they're super retarded.. as are most of the sheep who wear them regularly.
yeah it's not so much the boots themselves.. it's what they've turned into: the single most annoying piece of footwear in fashion history.
post #15 of 133
Thread Starter 
I live in a place where Zathans and Sevens by far outnumber Uggs. It doesn't annoy me, but considering that in the past H&M and Zara were the height of fashion (and the priciest of the fashions at that), I certainly would never judge people or base my preferences on something commonly worn. Heck, I come from a country where for decades all the people wore the clothes from the same factory and you had to stand for days in a line to buy sneakers. We are not talking about a specific brand or quality of workmanship here - just sneakers in general. Something sporty that didn't look like the siberian version of Uggs.
The good part in that is people learned to look beyond the covers, beyond the clothing. Once you have the means anyone can buy jeans for $200 or a tee for $100. You don't need talent or personality for that. Books, education, literacy on the other side... You can't just make that happen. Yet somehow very few seem to care. I dislike the corny comparison, but I'll make it anyway - this is like Ab Fab played out in real life.
Just not quite as funny.
post #16 of 133
im gonna step up front and say im sorry about that thread, because i was the one who posted it.

i do want to clarify my intentions a little though.

first, i dont think anyone here "judges" someone based on how they dress. tongue and cheek anecdote i dont think anyone here doesnt become friends with someone just because "they are wearing last year's Manolos".

the same precept goes for my intention. i was strictly eluding to the aesthetics. the visuals. the fashion. i think there should be a clear distinction that critiqueing a visual element has no clear correlation with the person's personality. no doubt art or fashion isnt a science, but that doesnt mean we cant treat it objectively or else there would be no progress in art and culture would be stagnant.

nonetheless, i want to make it clear that noone is "hating" anybody. fashion can be viewed strictly for its visuals. formalism anybody? and im not saying this like im trying to bullshit one of my art history papers (yes im an art history major), but i honestly can look at a model on a cover of Vogue and while the mass may scream "THAT GIRL IS ANOREXIC" and god forbid, she probably is, but all im seeing is how that Balenciaga dress drapes. im not judging who she is as a person, im judging how she looks and nothing beyond that.

nonetheless, i want to re say that i apoligize because i really dont feel well when im misunderstood.
post #17 of 133
so for aerobicgirl, trampzilla, foralltruecitizens, and anyone else, hope that makes some sense.
post #18 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by csirip
it depends on how the person carriers his/her-self. if some silly girl walks around with her nose in the air because shes wearing juicy from head to toe, ill call her a stupid cunt.
I tend to agree, except for the "stupid ****" part

it irks me when i hear girls saying, "check out my new SEVEN FOR ALL MANKIND jeans" or "look, i'm wearing CITIZENS OF HUMANITY jeans" etc. i personally think clothes generally and designer clothes in particular are not necessarily meant to be indicators of one's "uplifted" status in society - they just mean someone has chosen to spend more money, for whatever reason, on a particular item of clothing than another person.

an average person wearing crap clothes who is confident in him/herself is much sexier than a hot person wearing designer clothes who thinks he/she is the shit.
post #19 of 133
Here is what make-ith a man: The will to do what is right, and a pair of testicles.
post #20 of 133
Ask the same question on a diffrent forum but substitute clothes for cars, computers, cell phones, anything really and you will get a similar response.

"No its not the jeans/car/computers but rather the person inside. However, its really a a turn on to see a hot guy/girl with an ///M Car/Diesels/Cisco server."

But to satisfy your curiosity lets ask Mr. Mark Twain.

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society."
post #21 of 133
I am the only person in the group I hang out with that wears designer clothing. I hang out with people who I enjoy spending time with and base this strictly on their personality - I could care less what their wardrobe consists of. As far as dating goes, brand names don't mean much, although I feel weird being with someone who is wearing old clothes that do not flatter their body. When I first started dating my bf, he wore old faded black jeans that were too small or old wranglers that looked awful on him and an old faded t-shirt that he had had for years. He looked A LOT better just by getting stuff from Old Navy. Clothes that flatter whatever body type a person has and dont look like old rags is much more important to me than the particular brand.

I was actually interested in starting a thread asking how important physical attraction is in finding a partner. Could you date someone who is perfect in every way except you are not physically attracted to them at all? How about someone who you find very physically attractive, but has no fashion sense?
post #22 of 133
I live in a place where nobody really dresses designer, including me. I have designer jeans, a few coaches, some juicy, and some nice shoes but really that's about it. Anyway, most of my friends dress out of aeropostale or abercrombie kids...and whatever, that's cool, because I buy stuff from there, too. I don't judge people by what they wear, well, at least I hope I don't. I am sure I am guility of looking and somebody and seen that they were wearing a hollister jacket and I was wearing juicy and it gave me a superiority complex but I don't do this all the time. My best friend is amazing, she loves my clothes but can't afford them herself, so I let her borrow my stuff when she wants to, and I buy her sevens and juicy for her birthday because she loves them.

What maketh a man? Confidence in what you wear, and how you wear your personality. The man of my dreams for 3 years lives in the middle of nowhere, dresses right out of stage, and it truly not all that great-looking but he is one of the most amazing people I have ever met, and I love him so much for that, much more than I could ever love a person who just dressed well.
post #23 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by missmk
What maketh a man? Confidence in what you wear, and how you wear your personality.
I agree on this alot. But I admit that some stuff can't be pulled off by certain people no matter how confident they are
post #24 of 133
Juding people based on their clothes is straight up retarded, just like the saying "never judge a book based on it's cover" but I admit, thats how I was in high school, now that I'm in college, it's completley different, I hang out with people I would never have even talked to in HS, my friends are mainly people who listen emo/punk and metal/rock and whatnot, they dress completely different from me, I don't even tell them about my clothes, cause if I told them I spent $100 on jeans or whatever, they'd think I'm a freaking crackhead lol. Most of them don't have a lot of money, but that doesn't matter to me either, we just enjoy hangin out, shooting shit and doing whatever. If you're dressed up in all designer clothes or not, it doesn't matter to me, as long as you're not looking sloppy as hell, and smell bad, I'll talk to a person and may become good friends with a person.
post #25 of 133
Quote:
Originally Posted by JillianS
Dude, just cuz it's expensive, doesn't mean it looks good. And just cuz it's not, doesn't necessarily mean it looks bad (note, the necessarily, cuz there's some ughly cheapo tacky sheit out there..)
Jillian, i totally agree. i know this one chick who is prolly decked out in 2-300 dollar outfits on a regular basis and doesn't look good because she doesn't carry herself well (lacks confidence) and she also just puts random stuff together cuz she knows it's expensive.

i for one have some really expensive stuff and some of the cheap (but still nice) stuff because I like it and they're a reflection of who i am. i think that the way one dresses should be a reflection of who one is and not how many bills are in their wallet. if someone carries off the cheap stuff just as well as someone carries off the expensive sh*t than what's the difference, in the end they're both gonna look like confident and attractive people.
many people though simply think that oh if spent a coupla hundred bucks on these jeans than i must be lookin hot, often it can be quite the contrary.

so if i judge someone simply based on their clothing it's my first impression of them. if we haven't spoken than how else can i make a first impression. this first impression though in no way stops me from getting to know someone. how long can clothes maketh a man, right until the first words are uttered. after that i, as i'm sure most other people judge the person on their personality.

a jack/dumbass will still be a jack/dumbass even if he's wearing a lacoste polo and diesel jeans.

this of course is all MO.
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