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Men are just happier people

post #1 of 18
Thread Starter 
Sent to me in an email from my friend.


NICKNAMES

· If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

· If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.


EATING OUT

· When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

· When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.


MONEY

· A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

· A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.


BATHROOMS

· A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .

· The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.


ARGUMENTS

· A woman has the last word in any argument.

· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


FUTURE

· A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

· A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


SUCCESS

· A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

· A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


MARRIAGE

· A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

· A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.


DRESSING UP

· A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

· A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.


NATURAL

· Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


OFFSPRING

· Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

· A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.


THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
post #2 of 18
Haha. I like this one. Pretty much true...
post #3 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by dannysgirl45 View Post
Haha. I like this one. Pretty much true...
Except for some of the guys on this forum would probably identify with the women side more... millions of bathroom items, clothing sales, dressing up...
post #4 of 18
Haha. I like this one too! It's definitely something I'll forward onto my family and friends. Thanks for the read!
post #5 of 18
it's 'cause women have all those "emotions" and shit... screw that crap!
post #6 of 18
Women wear skin tight pants, men don't.


Wait a second...
post #7 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by myztikal47 View Post
ARGUMENTS

· A woman has the last word in any argument.

· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
Hope that is not as true as people make it out to be.

Quote:
Originally Posted by myztikal47 View Post
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
post #8 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by mdg1976 View Post
it's 'cause women have all those "emotions" and shit... screw that crap!
emotions should be banned!
post #9 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Malencontreux View Post
Except for some of the guys on this forum would probably identify with the women side more... millions of bathroom items, clothing sales, dressing up...


Yes. I think jskidder has more scarves than i do!
post #10 of 18
Is this a Saifz proxy post?
post #11 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by myztikal47 View Post
NATURAL

· Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
WTF IS UP WITH THIS?!!?!
post #12 of 18
Beer goggles
post #13 of 18
This is the reason why HF is a ghost town.
post #14 of 18
Well of course you are happy - we do everything for you
post #15 of 18
Don't forget about the penis. The penis is indeed much fun. Much less... maintenance.
post #16 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by mgoeclipse View Post
Don't forget about the penis. The penis is indeed much fun. Much less... maintenance.
And we don't bleed out of it every month either... well, not unless we have a venereal disease of some sort.
post #17 of 18
^ Yes, the penis would beat up the vagina any day. (Pun intended)
post #18 of 18
Quote:
· When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

· When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
omg so true!
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